Title: I let things pile up

[swirlsofpurple]

 

I let things pile up,

Books and letters and emails and messages,

Words tucked away,

Where they cannot touch me, or taunt me,

Or drain me or haunt me.

 

I don’t have the energy.

 

I let things pile up,

Like a wall of dull metal bricks,

Held together with a cement,

That’s part anxiety, part depression and part laziness,

Part existential being,

I don’t know the ratios of each part.

 

I let things pile up,

Stories unwritten, words unsaid, deeds undone,

Acts tucked away,

Where they cannot shame me,

Or blame me.

 

I don’t have the time.

 

I let things pile up,

Ailments unresolved, prescriptions unfilled,

And there’s water coming through the bricks,

Wetting my feet.

I take down one brick at a time,

It’s weighty in my brittle hands,

Two appear in its place.

 

I let things pile up,

Sights unseen, roads untraversed, dreams unexplored,

Conversations un-encountered,

Life tucked away,

Where it cannot hurt me.

 

I don’t know what to say.

 

I let things pile up,

These small bricks seem insurmountable,

Untenable, I dismantle,

One day at a time,

And the wall stays level,

So I must be fine.

Comments

[bsgsix]

Very relatable, and I love the "stacking up" in this form - even the layout of the poem and how it stacks up is great. I'm not usually a poetry fan for Idol, but I'll admit that this one is TRULY a solid piece (even if things are crumbling - again, I relate. "I must be fine" is never what it seems).

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you, so glad you found it relatable and liked the layout :).

Yeah, the 'must be fine' is one of those things, I don't tend to be very overt with what I'm going through and a lot of people think that means things are in the past and no longer problems for me.

[bleodswean]

THIS is AMAZING. Absolutely astonishingly fantastic work. Wow, J.

[swirlsofpurple]

Wow, this is such a lovely compliment, makes me happy, thank you :).

[adoptedwriter]

Yes. This is my the month before school let’s out. In June I heal.

[swirlsofpurple]

*Hugs*

Thank you :).

[static_abyss]

I like your use of repetition and how that made reading each section that much more impactful. Excellent job!

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you, so glad you found it impactful :)

[reidharriscooper]

This hit hard and such a different meaning and feeling then I expect from the term. Well developed and formulated.

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you, I was hoping it would hit, so I'm glad that worked :).

Yeah, I saw the prompt and this was where my muse immediately went :).

[fausts_dream]

This is great. Some of the published and anthologized poems I selected as examples for my Sophomore English Class were less well done

[swirlsofpurple]

Oh wow, that's an amazing compliment, thank you :).

[ellster_kyle]

I love this so much. I appreciate your honesty about anxiety and depression and the vivid metaphor you've employed. I can definitely relate, and reading this today made me feel less lonely.

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you :).

I'm so pleased that this made you feel less lonely. That's such an important part of making something like this, so we can all feel a little less alone.

[rayaso]

This was wonderful. The repetition was very effective. I especially liked "I let things pile up,/Like a wall of dull metal bricks".

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you, so glad you found the repetition effective. And I really liked those bits so I'm happy they worked for you :).

[kimschlotwrites]

I love this. I definitely relate to “Don’t have the energy.”

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you :).

IKR. The energy thing, sometimes it's like even the smallest of things there's just no energy.

[tjoel2]

I enjoyed the rhythm of this piece.

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you, glad you enjoyed the rhythm :).

[tonithegreat]

Indeed as someone said above, this is very relatable! The things left undone and experiences not had part made me saddest. Don’t let those pile up! Although I sometimes feel like I’m doing that too.

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you, glad you found it relatable :).

I think I maybe made it sound worse than it was, I was in quite a morose mood. I do get out and enjoy myself. But yeah, often it's hard enough to get through the day, let alone try to do more. I do worry that I'm going to miss out on things in life while trying to make it through one day at a time.

[halfshellvenus]

Oh, I really liked this! Such terrific wordplay in parts like "touch me or taunt me or drain me or haunt me" and "acts tucked away where they cannot shame me or blame me."

Life tucked away where it cannot hurt me.
I feeling I think many of us know all too well-- the temptation, if not the really, but adding in depression and anxiety, a very likely reality.

And the conclusion was nice as well! To some degree, maybe that IS what being fine looks like, at least some of the time: coping as best we can, and nothing exploding. Things could be better, but they could also be worse.

[swirlsofpurple]

This is such a lovely comment, thank you so much :).

So glad you liked those lines, I was hoping they would work well.

[bewize]

I also let things pile up and sometimes it is so unbelievably overwhelming. It is one of my big life goals to stop doing that to myself.

Good entry.

[swirlsofpurple]

It's hard, it's kind of one of my goals too, because yes it can be so overwhelming, but then sometimes I think how much of it do I need to just let it be with. And how much of it needs to change. Hugs.

Thank you :).

[nayanawrites]

I loved this ... I have always maintained that I am not a big fan of poetry - buts such well written pieces like this - blow my mind away. There is remorse too in that I will never be able to write this sort of thing. I had initially planned on a similar format - but then I had all sorts of blocks preventing me from getting into the flow. Well done to you .... :-)

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you so much, that's such a lovely compliment :).

And I hope you one day find a way to write what you want to write.

[dmousey]

This hits close to home. I like how you formatted this piece. Thank you for sharing. 😊✌~~~d

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you, glad you liked the format :).

[murielle]

The first two verses could be mine they are so true for me, and throughout so many phrases and images I recognize, I know, intimately.

This is a beautiful poem, collection of observations and revelations, words strung together with skill and precision.

So familiar! So rich!

[swirlsofpurple]

*Hugs*

Thank you, so glad you liked the observations and revelations :)

[alycewilson]

I can identify! I like your use of repetition.

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you, glad you liked the repetition :).

[the_eternal_overthinker]

Wonderful use of the prompt! And I too found it quite relate-able. Loved how the repetition makes an everlasting impact. Well done!

[swirlsofpurple]

*Hugs*

Thank you, glad you liked the impact of the repetition :).

[onecheapdate]

One of the things I'm enjoying the most about this season of Idol is getting to read some poetry! I haven't done that in so long and I forgot how much I enjoy it. Your usage of repetition here is particularly one of my favorite styles of poetry and I love the way this flows. Well done, thank you for sharing it!

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you, glad you liked the repetition :).

[tatdatcm]

I love how the cadence piled up reflecting the idea of the prompt.

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you, glad you liked the cadence :).

[megatronix]

I really, really love this. So many of your word choices were just perfection. "conversations un-encountered, Life tucked away, where it cannot hurt me. I don't know what to say."

Hot damn, that passage really hit me hard. I can SO relate to this.

This is just so, so powerful. The last line especially!! We always tell ourselves we're fine, even when we're not. Dang. I'll be thinking about this one a while, I'm sure. Excellent work!!

[swirlsofpurple]

Wow, that's a lovely compliment, thank you so much, so glad you liked my word choices and found it powerful :).

*Hugs* Yeah IKR, there are different levels of fine.

[reidharriscooper]

Acknowledgement of readership and enjoyment.

[swirlsofpurple]

Thank you.